In a groundbreaking initiative to promote family bonding and civic engagement, former President Donald Trump has announced a nationwide series of “Build-A-Wall” LEGO workshops. These events, to be hosted at malls across America, invite citizens of all ages to channel their inner architect and construct miniature replicas of Trump’s famous border wall using LEGO bricks.
Bringing Families Together, One Brick at a Time
“Families love LEGOs,” Trump explained during a press conference at Mar-a-Lago, standing next to a golden replica of a border wall made entirely from LEGO bricks. “I said, ‘Why not bring the LEGOs, bring the families, and let them see how tremendous walls are? It’s fun, it’s educational, and it’s patriotic!'”
Each participant will receive a complimentary “Make America Build Again” hard hat and a set of custom, limited-edition LEGO bricks embossed with tiny American flags. Workshops will also feature special guest appearances by pro-Trump influencers, offering tips on structural integrity and “the art of making walls great.”
Interactive and Competitive
To make the workshops even more engaging, participants will be divided into “states” to compete for prizes, including MAGA-themed lunchboxes and signed copies of The Art of the Deal. Judges will score the LEGO walls on height, creativity, and “defensiveness.”
“We’ll even have a moat-building round,” Trump teased. “A wall without a moat is like a burger without ketchup—still good, but not great.”
A Surprise Addition to the Trump Brand
Merchandise is already flying off the shelves, with kits available for at-home practice. The deluxe kit includes a mini Trump figurine, a model White House, and a tiny set of golden escalators. Critics have pointed out that the kits cost $99.99 each, but Trump dismissed concerns. “You can’t put a price on family values,” he said.
Critics Weigh In
Not everyone is thrilled with the idea. Immigration advocates called the workshops “a dangerous oversimplification” of border issues. Meanwhile, environmentalists expressed concern about the LEGO waste generated by discarded practice walls.
“Just think about the turtles,” one activist tweeted, alongside a photo of a LEGO turtle stuck in a moat.
The First Workshop Kicks Off
The inaugural workshop is set to take place at a Florida mall next weekend. Trump himself will attend the event, promising to award “The Golden Brick Trophy” to the best wall-builder. “It’s going to be beautiful, folks,” Trump said. “And believe me, LEGOs have never looked so classy.”
As anticipation builds, families nationwide are already gearing up for what Trump has dubbed “the most tremendous family activity in American history.” Whether the workshops will bring Americans together—or create more division—remains to be seen. But one thing is certain: the LEGO aisle at Walmart will never be the same.
