In a move White House officials insist is “purely logistical,” former President Barack Obama’s official portrait was quietly relocated this week from the Grand Foyer to what staff are now calling “the Reflection Annex,” located directly inside the West Wing custodial supply closet.
The relocation comes just hours after President Trump unveiled a new portrait of himself in the Grand Foyer, depicting the moment he survived an assassination attempt by “staring the bullet into submission,” according to the artist.
White House Communications Director Steven Cheung confirmed the shuffle, stating, “President Obama is still being honored in a very dignified space. In fact, that closet has seen more foot traffic than the Lincoln Bedroom this year.”
A Matter of Aesthetics
According to White House decorators, the decision was based on “color balance” and “mop compatibility.”
“Obama’s suit really pops against the industrial gray of the janitorial cinderblock,” said Chief White House Interior Visual Director and unofficial cousin of Eric Trump, Lonny T. Knuckle. “And the ammonia bottles reflect the light beautifully.”
Critics, however, have pointed out that the new location includes a motion-sensor air freshener that emits a loud hiss every 45 seconds and a handwritten sign reading “Do Not Unplug Floor Buffer.”
Presidential Placement Protocols
Historically, portraits of past presidents have been given places of prominence in the White House. When asked about this tradition, Press Secretary Melinda Furlough responded, “Look, traditions evolve. Obama now watches over the very supplies that keep America’s floors shining. If anything, that’s symbolic of hope.”
She later added, “Besides, we left the door open. It’s technically still visible from the hallway if you squint and lean in.”
Reactions from the Public
Reaction has been mixed.
A tourist from Idaho reported accidentally mistaking the closet for the restroom. “Imagine my surprise when I opened the door and there was President Obama, next to a bucket and a motivational poster that said ‘Make Every Spill Count.’”
Meanwhile, the White House gift shop is now selling commemorative postcards titled “Hope & PineSol”, featuring a smiling Obama next to a mop labeled “Change.”
Trump Responds
When asked about the decision, President Trump told reporters, “Obama? He’s lucky I didn’t hang it in the basement. That closet is fantastic. Tremendous airflow.”
He then pointed to his own portrait in the Grand Foyer, noting, “That’s what courage looks like. Very strong chin.”
